I will fly
Have a really lived a life of such pain?
that i can't understand such kindness?
only soft words
as my tears of a lost past subside.
Such a refreshing change
this being of grace
depth to his soul
and kindness in his heart
has the guts to not turn me away
a friendship made from heaven.
and do i deserve it all?
do i deserve the right to try and make my future better than my past?
let's hope i have the strength.
and i will wipe this heavy slate
i've had hanging around my neck
and start to carve my new path
life has stung
and life has burned
but i will fly.
Can you spare me a laugh,
or even a smile?
can you spare me some love,
just for a while?
Can you give me some time,
to show what a good person i can be?
to show you my heart, before you disagree?
I have just one question,
i'm asking on my knees,
i know it seems hard,
but it would put my mind at ease.
I love you, my friend, you're a part of me.
Do you forgive me, or is this just a game?
do you see the new me.
My hopes visible in my eyes
my dreams just need to be embraced
the pain i've felt from him alone
is something only recently faced.
The scars are faint, the bruises gone
no trace of him is near
but in my eyes, the tears of hurt remain
and i can still feel my fear.
But he is gone, he's locked away
where he can hurt no more
my only prayer, is for the girl
he's sent to heaven's door.
So if i cry, and say it's hard
to think of sunny days
please know that it is for the lost
the one who truly pays.
Day after day
this pain it seeps
right through my heart, through my blood.
I still have to deal
with the long nights of thought
with the sting of knowing
that you did all this to me.
I should be fine
so what? you hurt me.
time and time again.
but i gave you something precious, that can't be regained.
And I feel like some object
that's been used and thrown away
and i realise my mistake
and i regret it with every *piece* of me.
How could i not see?
see right through you.
I usually can, you know that.
I usually can tell about people.
Why couldn't i tell about you?
why was i so blind?
what tricks you played with me..
and ripped my heart out and threw it away
when you threw away my innocence.
Damn you. Why me? So many girls in the world you could have used so much, and you chose me.
Get out. I don't want to know you.
This deep sadness is eating away at my sanity.
I don't hate people. I don't hold grudges.
But i won't forgive you again.
Oooh you're sooo clever.
Got your knife in the lie jar again, honey
trying to spread it around some more.
I'll let you trip and fall flat on your face again.
You're not ever worth the ground i walk on anymore.
Why stoop to your level?
those who believe your foolish tales are staring into the eyes of someone who's hurt more girls than he can count.
What have you go to protect you?
your fists?
i know you're flexible but i doubt you can bruise me from 13,000 miles away, babe.
Spin yourself into your own lil web of deceit.
and get a new rumour.
you wouldn't know decency if it bit you in the balls.
But then again, you knew pain when i kicked you there!
The pounding fists
matched the beat of my heart
as you brought them down
upon my skin.
Crushed my brittle bones
as you crushed my confidence
and brought such fear into my existance.
Playing with my heart
as you play with my innocence
and dangle my happiness in front of me on a thread that's wearing thin.
How profound you are.
You stand before me
with your quick judgements, lies and criticisms
and insult my intelligence
by comparing yourself to me.
What gives you the right to be so superior?
What makes you better than me?
Your quick tongue? your pretty friends?
or is it the fact that you think you can take away any lil shred of dignity i might still have left.
Well hello? Have you been listening to the class, Elise Montgomery?
You don't know a damn thing about me.
Though i thought i knew you..
quite. well. indeed.